Gone are the days of love letters. Long, 10-page ascriptions of love. Now, people profess their love in 140 characters or less. Texting is the new way to communicate, it offers quickness, directness, and brevity, allowing you to get directly to the point and directly to somebody’s heart. Though you may not be able to go into quite so much detail as in a love letter, or even a 21st-century email, you can still use the text message to get across almost any point you wish, and particularly any small compliment or flirtatious message that you want to pass on.But using the text message in relationships can be fraught with difficulties. Because there is no intonation or emotion embedded in the message, smileys aside, a message can easily be misread and misconstrued the team to big problems in the relationship. Therefore I’ve put together five quick relationship texting rules that, if you follow, will allow you to use texting to your benefit in your relationship and avoid any misinterpretations, embarrassment, and arguments.
Do Use It For A Quick Follow Up
If you’ve just started dating somebody then it’s perfectly legitimate to use a text message to quickly follow up after the date. You do not necessarily want to get into a conversation in the text but a quick ‘I had a great time yesterday’ or ‘was wonderful seeing you tonight’ is an easy way to tell somebody what you thought quickly and efficiently. It tells the other person that you had a good time and that you are thinking of them and that you would like the same again. A big problem off to first dates is when exactly to get in contact again, with people saying the follow up must come within 24 hours, 48 hours, or 54.6741 hours, depending on which advice column you choose to read. Whatever the right time is, a quick text message allows you to make this first contact very quickly and very briefly so that the person knows that you had a good time and that you would like a second date.
Don’t Use It To Plan A Date
However, you should make sure that you do not use text messaging to plan the second date. By this time you should be comfortable talking to the person, and therefore you should phone them to make plans for another date. If you make the plan save a text message, it can look very impersonal and as if you’re not interested talking to them, or are still too shy. Either way it will put them off. The hay like an adult and pick up the phone to make any plans.
Do Use It For Cute Asides
once you have been dating for a while, or even within those first couple of dates, text messages a really good way of breaking the ice and getting to know one another. A few messages, funny or flirtatious, throughout the day can really help the relationship get started. The other person will look forward to the buzz of their phone as they know it will be a new message from you.Again, you do not want to go overboard with this, constantly sending the messages throughout the day, everyday. But once or twice, when you have something interesting or funny to say, can really work wonders. It works especially well in the day or two after a date in reminiscing about the date. You can tell the person that you just saw something that’s reminded you of the night you spent together. Small little messages like this are exactly what text messaging is for.
Don’t Use It For Arguments
What text messaging is not for, is arguments. As I said because it is difficult to get emotion across in text messaging, every single thing you say can come across very bluntly. Therefore, if you are already arguing with somebody everything you say who seem very negative. If you start arguing over text message it is very difficult to find a resolution and you will end up having to speak to the person anyway. Therefore it is better to talk to the person, ideally in person or over the phone if you need to discuss something serious. Text messaging and its 140 characters is for fun and speed, not seriousness
Don’t Use It To Break Up
In that vein, something you should deftly not to ever text message is breakup with somebody. If you do not have the balls to do it in person, or over the phone, then perhaps you should not have got started in relationship to start off with. Have the decency to talk to the person one-on-one whenever you want to end the relationship rather than sending them a quick text message. They will want to talk to you anyway, so best to get it over with in one go.